i know that life can change. it has happened to me. sometimes the change is painful, sometimes not. today i was reminded that life can change in the blink of an eye.
i found out this afternoon that a friend of mine's home was broken into and she was held at gunpoint while being robbed. the only reason she wasn't assaulted was because her 3 year old child was there. then, literally 10 minutes after i find that out....
i was driving down 7th east and i noticed there were people standing on the side of the road with their hands cupped over their mouths in obvious shock. i could see in the distance a heap of black, tangled, smoking metal and instantly knew it had to be a motorcycle. just as soon as it registers that this was a horrific accident, i realize that the doors to the ambulance were open and they were frantically in the process of loading someone. as i drove by, i was feet from the victim and could see the condition of his body and clothing.
immediately i found myself in pain. i think it was just alot to process in such a short amount of time. the life of a friend of mine and the life of a complete stranger. whenever i hear or see other people in pain or hurting it affects me deeply. though, it wasn't until recently that i have felt compelled to do something about it. i can tell you exactly what caused that change in me.
when we found out about brooklyn the pain and anquish i felt seemed unbearable. i remember the pain lasting for days on end with no relief. i can recall sitting in the doctor's office watching other women laughing and smiling. probably finding out they were pregnant for the first time, finding out the sex of their baby, or hearing their child's heartbeat for the first time.
i also remember driving the 30 miles to LDS hospital to see the specialist in silence with brady. i can recall the people in the cars next to us laughing and smiling as they sang along to the radio, visiting with other passengers, or talking on their cell phones.
i had many a moment like this.
do i think for one second that these people have not experienced pain in their own lives? no.
do i think that they don't deserve to laugh and smile or be happy? heavens no.
but what i did learn is that the world doesn't stop for your pain. life goes on and sometimes seemingly without you. and you have two choices: quit and give up, or keep on keeping on.
if you pay attention, you could pick up on the server who seems scatter brained, forgetful, slow or just simply in a bad mood. ~consider that last night some freak broke down not only her locked front door, but her locked bedroom door while she was home alone with her 3 year old sleeping planning to attack her and take all of her money. or the friend or mom who seems distant, preoccupied, or never calls you back. ~consider that it is all she can do to get out of bed in the morning and get herself ready, let alone 3 other children because of the fear of the unknown in the health of her child.
reach out to the people around you. we all have our hard. i know that. but if we were a little more gentle, a little more kind, a little more patient or empathetic...we could change people. and that kind of change is not the difficult, shake you to the core kind of change. it is the kind of change we all crave and welcome.
i challenge you. the next time you are out and about, look around you, look outside of yourself. i guarantee there is someone whose heart is breaking, whose world has just been turned upside down. once you recognize it, seize the opportunity: make eye contact, smile, let them go first, pat them on the back, wink, start a conversation or say a little prayer. when the world is going on around you and you are blessed with an opportunity like this... know that those are the moments that not only change another person, but also change you.
thanks for listening, i just had to say that.
note to self: remember to take own advice
i found out this afternoon that a friend of mine's home was broken into and she was held at gunpoint while being robbed. the only reason she wasn't assaulted was because her 3 year old child was there. then, literally 10 minutes after i find that out....
i was driving down 7th east and i noticed there were people standing on the side of the road with their hands cupped over their mouths in obvious shock. i could see in the distance a heap of black, tangled, smoking metal and instantly knew it had to be a motorcycle. just as soon as it registers that this was a horrific accident, i realize that the doors to the ambulance were open and they were frantically in the process of loading someone. as i drove by, i was feet from the victim and could see the condition of his body and clothing.
immediately i found myself in pain. i think it was just alot to process in such a short amount of time. the life of a friend of mine and the life of a complete stranger. whenever i hear or see other people in pain or hurting it affects me deeply. though, it wasn't until recently that i have felt compelled to do something about it. i can tell you exactly what caused that change in me.
when we found out about brooklyn the pain and anquish i felt seemed unbearable. i remember the pain lasting for days on end with no relief. i can recall sitting in the doctor's office watching other women laughing and smiling. probably finding out they were pregnant for the first time, finding out the sex of their baby, or hearing their child's heartbeat for the first time.
i also remember driving the 30 miles to LDS hospital to see the specialist in silence with brady. i can recall the people in the cars next to us laughing and smiling as they sang along to the radio, visiting with other passengers, or talking on their cell phones.
i had many a moment like this.
do i think for one second that these people have not experienced pain in their own lives? no.
do i think that they don't deserve to laugh and smile or be happy? heavens no.
but what i did learn is that the world doesn't stop for your pain. life goes on and sometimes seemingly without you. and you have two choices: quit and give up, or keep on keeping on.
if you pay attention, you could pick up on the server who seems scatter brained, forgetful, slow or just simply in a bad mood. ~consider that last night some freak broke down not only her locked front door, but her locked bedroom door while she was home alone with her 3 year old sleeping planning to attack her and take all of her money. or the friend or mom who seems distant, preoccupied, or never calls you back. ~consider that it is all she can do to get out of bed in the morning and get herself ready, let alone 3 other children because of the fear of the unknown in the health of her child.
reach out to the people around you. we all have our hard. i know that. but if we were a little more gentle, a little more kind, a little more patient or empathetic...we could change people. and that kind of change is not the difficult, shake you to the core kind of change. it is the kind of change we all crave and welcome.
i challenge you. the next time you are out and about, look around you, look outside of yourself. i guarantee there is someone whose heart is breaking, whose world has just been turned upside down. once you recognize it, seize the opportunity: make eye contact, smile, let them go first, pat them on the back, wink, start a conversation or say a little prayer. when the world is going on around you and you are blessed with an opportunity like this... know that those are the moments that not only change another person, but also change you.
thanks for listening, i just had to say that.
note to self: remember to take own advice
6 comments:
See what I mean, my child is amazing.
Even though my 86 year old mom has been stricken with Alzheimers, and is legally blind she practices what my daughter preaches to the extent of her ability to act.
She told me this morning, "Pat has lost his hat. His hair is a mess and he is having a really hard time without it. Everyone helped him look for it and no one can find it not even the workers." She asked if I had a spare hat. I went to the closet and pulled out one with an adjustable back. She promptly placed it lovingly into her purse. Smiling she said, "He's gonna flip when he sees this!"
You see my mom has the vision of making somebody elses day. Thanks mom. I love you.
i love grammy. i can remember many a story about grandpa crowley too. after seeing what i saw, all i have been thinking all day is maybe you and dad and brady should sell your bikes!
What a neat post. I feel so bad for your friend and that poor motercyclist. I can't even imagine how I would react or what I would do if I was held at gun point.
Bri, I love you so much what an inspiration you are! My mom has been sick for 8 years now, She has a rare auto immune deficiency disease that no one can figure out. How alone she feels all the time b/c she is basically trapped in her body. She can only eat 3 things. Baked potatoes, oatmeal, & green beans. She is the most amazing person I know. She is a fighter & doesn't complain. She is in pain all the time & it breaks my heart! I have a mom but, I can't even really go do anything with her any more b/c she is so allergic to smells. She feels so bad b/c she has not been able to come see me since we moved.
**Just thank you for the post b/c it really reminds me that I could do a lot better. I can't amagine your pain either!
xoxo
This really gets you thinking doesn't it. So beautifully written. The important things in life really get away from us sometimes. Thanks for your post.
Yeah ya'll think I'm braggin when I say that my wife is awsome!. Now you see for yourself. Its true that we hurt inwardly and love outwardly. I never felt as close to my wife as I did when we sat queitly in our thoughts on the way to the hospital. Fear of what to expect fear of how to deal and most of all the fear of how to console a mother of a child with a problem that is 1 in 100,000 get. How do you relate to that? I love you Briana! Simple words that mean more and more as we grow old together.
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